If Only Syndrome

Today I found something that I wrote awhile back. It was about a disease that I have now decided to call "If Only" Syndrome. Most have experienced it. It's the mindset that happiness is being held right outside of your reach. It's next point up on the ACT or the final that could bring your teetering grade up a letter. It's the missing point that would have won the game. It's the half second that you need to shed off your race time to make the state cut. It's the 10 pounds you know you'd look better without. It's the one more hour of sleep that you know would make you finally feel rested. It's the one more bite that you bet will make you full. It's that clothing item in the window that's just $15 beyond what you've got in your pocket. It's the relationship with a specific someone that you know will never be. It's the time that you totally freaked out and walked away, too scared to try. It's the approval from people you would desperately love to impress. It's the jumping and reaching for something just out of your grasp; but each time you touch it, you hit the ground and once again it's gone.
I think we live there too much. And as soon as we get what we've been wanting so desperately, we want something new because we realize what we have is not enough. So we get caught up in this vicious cycle of striving, sometimes failing, sometimes succeeding, but always ending up discontent. I mean, look at Pinterest. It's a social media site used to declare to the world that what you already have is not enough. And until you realize that ultimate satisfaction and true joy cannot be found in what you know, what you accomplish, what you own, what you look like, or what people think of you, you will never be truly and completely happy. It takes more. It takes Jesus. Once you have Jesus, what you have doesn't have to be enough. You don't have to be enough. Because Jesus is, always has been, and always will be enough in your place. There's so much peace in that. I wish everyone could experience it. Because, obviously.

Broken Things and Bomb Threats

So, yesterday and today have been nothing but misadventures. We can start with yesterday morning.
I overslept, but it's not as if that doesn't happen most days. Thankfully, my trusty father was at hand to wake me. After my shower, I re-entered my room and managed to slam my head on the door frame. Contrary to what you may assume after having read that, I am only 5'5" and could not hit my head on the top of my door frame. No, no, I managed to bang it on the side of the door frame. How does one accomplish such a task? I could not tell you; I only know that it happened to me.
Upon preparing my things for swim practice, I realized I left my bag in the van after practice the night before. When I retrieved it, I came to find out that my previously soggy suit was now frozen solid. Wonderful. Most definitely a first time experience for me.
In second block at school, I grabbed a notebook from my desk, only to knock my phone off of the desk and onto the hard, unforgiving floor. Relieved to see that it had not acquired even a scratch, I placed it back in my purse. Psyche! I went to use it a few minutes later, and all that showed was a flickering black and blue screen. My heart sank.

The rubber seal on the eye cup of my goggles ripped at practice in the middle of a sprint set with tight intervals, meaning little rest. Because of this, I swam with blurry vision, burning eyes, and no time to stop and fix anything. I repeated the "positive paradigms" that have been drilled into my head during m Academy for Young Leaders meetings and my student leadership class, taught to me by the book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. "I am strong. I am strong. I am strong," I chanted in my mind, but to no avail. More coughing and sputtering occurred than is socially acceptable.

Today was a completely separate misadventure altogether. Someone threatened to bomb our high school. As exhilarating as that seemed to be for the first eight minutes and forty-three seconds, it had grown incredibly old by the time three excruciatingly long, terribly cold, and hunger-pain filled hours had passed. Really though, one can only come up with so many conspiracy theories; I personally ran out after seventeen. Most disappointing of all, though, was that I couldn't tweet using #bombthreatthursday since my phone hadn't been replaced yet. As it turns out, there weren't even any bombs or suspicious packages! Bummer, am I right? Okay, I know I should be happy about that, but it was going to be one of the most exciting things to ever happen to me! Sad day.
I also found out that we have to get our team picture retaken for high school swimming because, as of this year, wearing swimsuits for a team picture is "indecent" and "offensive" and "inappropriate". I mean, just because we represent our school in front of hundreds in the same attire (or lack-thereof, I suppose), doesn't mean it's okay to have our picture taken in them. Because, obviously.